Resilient Reflections: How Old Are You?

How Old Are You?

Well, there are two certainties we know in life.

One - change is constant. 

Two - we can’t stop the aging process (some would say death and taxes but that seems a tad cynical). 

Both are truths. Both can’t be stopped. But how we respond to change and aging is within our control to a certain degree.

I for one, sign up for a lot of “interesting” folks or communities on social media that start out with a hook that grabs my attention and I read on. But slowly I feel their emails and messages often shift ever so slightly without me waking up one day and really noticing they are going down a path I’m no longer comfortable with—age and weight; age and beauty; age and wrinkles; age and menopause and why we women carry weight in our bellies; losing belly fat; getting rid of pregnancy fat; and so on. 

Now don’t get me wrong, watching your weight is important to ward off what could lead to more unhealthy lifestyles like diabetes, heart and stroke, ability to move and the like. But it feels like we as women are bombarded with how to lose weight and “look our best.”

Is it a medical doctor advising this? Well, if that’s the case then maybe they are more concerned about health issues or genetic issues that one needs to be aware of. But the reality is, most of us, do not look the same in our 40s or 50s or 60s and on, as we did in our 20s. Our bodies change. Some of us have children, gravity has an effect whether we like it or not and most often we are at a time in our lives where we are constantly on the run. Taking care of kids, parents, work, fitness, yoga, book clubs, hockey games, grocery shopping, meals, the list goes on. Life does not always get easier as we get older. And as women, putting ourselves first to take better care of ourselves, seems to be the first thing that goes on the back burner.

So I ask the question in the title, How Old Are You? And by this I don’t mean your age. I mean in your mind, your spirit, your happiness, your health. My mother in law is 94 and she is on the ball like no one! She’s active in her church, she Skypes with her family every weekend on the East coast, she’s on the  phone, knows how to use a laptop and is hilarious, sending jokes all the time. Her movement has slowed, and that’s it. 

I think how old we feel depends often on the outlook we take to life. Science backs this up. Those who have a glass half full kind of attitude tend to be healthier. Simply asking people how old they feel may tell you a lot about their health and well-being. And interestingly enough often most people as they age indicate they feel 10 years younger than they are! Yep, most folks feel younger than their chronological age, the older they are.

There is no question there are links between physical health and mental health, movement and cognitive function and memory. So instead of labelling women as being overweight, or having a stomach to get rid of, or getting rid of their wrinkles, maybe the focus needs to be on what we can do that keeps us as healthy as we can be, which ultimately means the happier we will be. 

Yoga has been an interesting lifeline for me. It saved me when I was in the deepest depths of despair. Truly. When I was actively doing yoga almost everyday (and not sweating yoga), I got in the best shape of my adult life! And not by weight. My fat reshaped into muscle to make me healthier but not lighter. You can gain muscle and greater bone strength throughout adulthood. And really, I’m not sure I care anymore if that little pot over my C-section scar matters. It’s a war wound of happiness and my life journey.

And what ever happened to laugh line wrinkles? Isn’t that part of the beauty of aging?

I’m now doing a teacher training on Subtle/Slow Yoga and how yoga can support the brain, cognitive function, memory and focus, concentration, and clarity. Yoga can do that. And for me, my brain health remains a critical component of aging.

My yoga journey has made me physically healthier, even though I still don’t look like I did in my 20s and 30s. It has made me calm and developed my abilities to fight anxiety, depression and build resilience to take on the constant change in the world around me. And now, I’m learning how yoga will create the ability to keep my brain healthy as I age. I feel pretty good for 55!

So, I ask again – How Old Are You? 

How we respond to change and aging is, to a certain degree, within our control.